It’s amazing how these subjects get placed on me. I just left breakfast with my kids’ honorary grandparents. Honorary? Yes, I label as such because my kids picked them. Well actually it was my daughter (so I guess girls have power. SMILE). And from that they have been an extreme blessing to my family.
Well during breakfast I shared the theme of the couples game party my husband and I are hosting in about 2 weeks. Their eyes had this glow about them as they listened. Both (not one) but both are pastors/ministers. They both speak and preach His Word everywhere they go. He is the official pastor…the rest of us are just waiting on her. Those two are a force to be reckoned with.
Well as I shared, they began to minister to and through me. They encouraged me and thanked God for what He is/was doing with me. Congratulated me for stepping out and allowing Him to use me. I mean I was free to share and it felt good. I mean really good. I haven’t shared the details of the party because it’s simple. My friends know I love games so they are coming to have a blast. The only difference (little secret) is that this fun will be different. They will leave like never before! There will be plenty of laughter on deck that will last beyond the hours of hosting.
You know how women, we can talk and talk and talk some more. My husband had left with our son so me and Mama Folks were talking each other under the table. Fighting for the floor. She shared and I shared. And Papa Folks is just like most men. He doesn’t waste words. But every now and then when he had something to say, he would jump in there and make it known.
This journey has been just that. One week is not the same as the week before. Each morning I awake to new ideas and I immediately march out on them. During this time, I got to the point that if I hear Him I need to MOVE. So in the middle of me and Mama’s talk about the venue and things I’ve done and ordered that was so last minute (I.e. Professional photos, web designer, banners, etc); Papa jumps in and says “how can I help? Money or whatever. Something I can pay for?”
Silence. I couldn’t say anything but “ummm well.” I hesitated. I didn’t have an answer. You see the way my head and heart works, it’s hard for me to tell anyone of a need especially when it comes to money. I’ve always been like this. I can’t help it. When someone asked me for my charge to speak at their event, I said “nothing.” They said they would talk with their pastor on something to give me for at least driving down. I was about to talk him out of that and had to tell myself “girl hush! Let them bless you if they want to.” And what did I do with the gas gift cards? Gave them away. I’m crazy! I know.
So after he asked about helping financially I went to telling him that others have asked and so what I decided to do was to put a “love” box at the entrance so before people leave I’d let them know it’s there to give something IF they so desired. Told them I actually woke today with the idea of a paypal for the company/blog. And so I of course, created it right then. Mama then says “that’s a great idea, let them sew a seed.” Hummm I like that. Instead of “love” I think I will call it “seed” box.” BAM! Then I continued the discussions about the event. Papa jumps in again “do you have a GoFundMe? That way I can give whenever and you don’t know what I do.” š¤
Mama Folks and I continued to talk with Papa occasionally jumping in with thoughts. He would have a serious look on his face yet her eyes were bouncing with joy. Papa stated again, “start a GoFundMe and create it around the theme of the book you want to write (ummm yeah so I’m going to start a book after this quarter is over…I teach and the quarter ends in about 5 days). Make it catchy. Something like “women are in control while men trying to be in control.” Wow! Each time he had something to say he would go back to my theme. He was offering up so much. I would just nod and say ok. Before he left he said it again “let me know what the GoFundMe is called when you get it up.”
On the drive home, I started getting anxious. Excited. Couldn’t wait to get home to get this off my chest! He had given me a message. I needed to hurry to move out. Well here is my transparent moment. I will never act like I could afford with cash everything I’ve done in the last 2 weeks. Some things I’ve paid for. Others I’ve charged. Got a credit card for the blog in order to NOT limit what I had to do. I originally had a $500 limit just on the party not the stuff before the party. Told myself I can throw $500 to it easy. But of course, I’m way deeper in now. Hadn’t told my husband but had been talking to God the entire time. Prayed “Lord I’m going in with both my feet and I will not worry about these coins because I know You will give it back. I will not tell the school I’m staying so I can pay for this. I will not limit what needs to be done out of fear of the bill it will leave. I will trust in Your Plan for me.” Eventually told my husband this week “babe I’ve busted this budget.” He laughed and said “I bet you have.”
Readers of this blog…God is moving. One thing He is teaching me is to be BOLD and intentionally about this new journey. I can’t take it lightly. I can’t half step. Whenever I talk myself out of something because of the cost, I’m reminded that He has me. He knows I’m extremely self-conscious about having my hand out. He knows that I’m actually an introvert and don’t talk about what I have going on out of humility. But He has helped me know how to honor my humility with sprinkling in boldness without shame! So now He is helping me to allow people to fill my closed fist one step at a time.
So with His Word shared to me through His servant, I have taken Papa’s advice. Rather you give $1 or 50 cents just know that it will be appreciated. Now part B of this message, the title of this blog was feed into me as well. So from now until this couples party, I plan to complete this series of how woman holds the power. Man, if you are reading this, don’t fret. You can be blessed from reading this series as well. Power is something men fight over, not women. But the power I speak of is not the power men seek. Plus the power God gives us is not takable or transferable (nor can you sit it down woman of God), so I ask that your read before assuming.
If God can speak through a donkey and change the course of a man’s life, surely He can use me. (Numbers 22:21-39)
https://www.gofundme.com/bringing-marriage-back
http://paypal.me/competitionof1
Thank you for your attention. Remember you are your own competition.
Competitionof1
Sylvia Folks
What a blessing you, James and the kids are to us. We love you and bless God for you. Our prayer for you is that you stay in prayer, be still and listen, when God speak you move out. We love you and we are here for you in whatever you need. Can’t wait to see the journey God is about to take you and James on.
NRedmon
Thank you so much! We appreciate the love and support.
Marie'a Manor
Awesome post Nakia!!!! You got me thinking girl
NRedmon
What you thinking about honey! Thank you