For those that have been following my last two blogs, I've been on a rampage of slapping, punching, and kicking everyone and everything out to threaten my marriage!! And from the response on Facebook, I'm not by myself. If you haven't had a chance to read them, please check them out as this is sort of a continued discussion on marriage. Part 1: I will fight over my man. Part II: My battle plan.

When I started this blog over 2 months ago, my sister asked me what made me want to start a blog. My response was, "Facebook can't hold me!" I said that to say, most of the things I want to really share with the world…Facebook isn't the place for it. Facebookers for the most part want to see pictures and short statements. Maybe 5-8 sentences at once before your post is half read or ignored. The attention spans are short.

The blog was the perfect avenue for me because if you are interesting in my topic, going to my blog is intentional. That's another newly clocked favorite word of mine, "intentional." It's up next to my other word "bold." So I'm learning to become more bold and intentional with my efforts. I'm learning to operate in boldness as He gifted me with this gift intentionally.

With continuing with my marriage revelation, through my lenses I've come up with what I think may be the reason for divorces reaching the 90% rate. That's not a true rate but one thing is sure, at the current rate of divorce, the 90% is achievable, believable, and celebratable (made up word but I bet you caught it).

Here it is. Look around. We want everything we want and we want to get it and/or achieve it with as little complication as possible as soon as we snap our fingers. We are the most selfish ass folks that I know and that you know…and that you know and you! We want what we want…when we want it…and we want it all to be EASY! I repeat we want what we want, when we want it, and it better be easily attainable and sustainable!

If it's not (a) at our reach the next day after we willed it to be there, (b) if it's not the way we want it with peppa pig light pink polka dots, (c) if it doesn't come with attitude that meshes well with our attitudes, (d) if it doesn't resemble all the things we listed years ago, (e) if it doesn't come with the paper we imagined it would be equipped with, (f) if it doesn't submit to all things as we see fit, (g) if it has extra pounds we never envisioned, (g) if it doesn't wakes up with that mask we were expected laced in lace, (h) if it changed or won't change accordingly to our taste, I (i)…EYE want OUT! YOU want out!

When it seems too hard to do, no matter what it is, if it appears to require of us…WE WANT OUT!

They said marriage wasn't easy but they made it look easy! We go into that thing with a made up mind. Confessing I'm going to be different. I'm not going to do what my parents did. For me and my house, we shall serve the Lord! It won't be hard for me. It will be easy because I will WILL it to be so. It's hard for you because you did something wrong obviously. But not for me.

Yep yep…we walk into that thing with all the right words of confirmation but as I've stated several times before…the enemy heard those words as well. As you willed so does he. And as soon as this thing gets hard, we want OUT! We want out because it suppose to be easy because we said so. Dammit! If i say it will be easy, it will be easy! Yet why is marriage so hard? Well keep your answer because I got another made up mind…and it says I want out!

And just in case you are reading this for a friend, you got a vice too. College is too hard, I'M OUT. I don't care if this is their roof, I'm practically an adult, I'M OUT. Taking care of these bills all by myself, I'M OUT, it was better at my parent's house. These folks thank I clocked in to work, I'M OUT. These church folks are all hypocrites and I'm not giving no man all of my money, I'M OUT. I think I discovered my purpose in life but it came with a list of all these requirements, ummm no thanks I'M OUT. You hurt my feelings, doesn't matter that it's true, who made you the judge, I'M OUT.

When things get tough…we RUN away! And why? Why is it so easy to run away from what we say we want? We begged for a wife or husband. Get them and all of a sudden everything is wrong with them. Ever notice how easy it is to list out your spouse's wrong or aggravating things yet you never list out your own. Like who came honestly say they've checked themselves before? I'll wait.

You don't like him keeping the toilet seat up but he doesn't like you having the toilet paper facing over versus under. You don't like the toothpaste in his sink but he doesn't like that you squeeze the toothpaste from the top of the tube. And wanna know the truth, out of every marriage only one will complain about those things while the other one ignores them. Ever notice that. There is usually only one complainer/nagger in the house. One with OCD. One more financial conscious. One with the cooking skills. None of this speaks to everyone but we all can relate that we went into our marriages knowing "opposites attract." Yet those differences drive us to irreconcilable differences that often leads to divorce.

It gets hard and we want out. We want out of our marriages and responsibilities because it's not easy. Amazingly since it's not easy, love has won, because our friend so better understands what we need, how we need it, how often we need it, and when we need it. So it's unnatural to understand that old love so we create another love that now so many believe to be the true love.

Instead of creating an outlet to have conversations with the one we married to learn what he or she wants and or desires and respecting what we hear and not what we feel it should be…instead we choose to logon to another outlet and have discussions with all of the world more that the one you confessed a vow to. Call my bluff, how much do you want to bet that you talk more to followers than you do with your spouse? Twitter knows more about you than your wife mister. Instagram knows more about you than your husband does ma'am. The DM knows more than your wife knows about you sir! (Shots fired)

Am I here to ridicule you if your marriage didn't work? Let me say this, if that is what you've read in any of this series, you need to log off now with all that foolery. I'm here to be a realist. Time out for fakeness. Our marriages are suffering because we don't want to put in the work, we don't want to try, it's easier to give up…here is the towel! We want out! It's not EASY!

One of my favorite Jim Rohn quotes says, "Don’t wish it was easier, wish you were better. Don’t wish for less problems, wish for more skills. Don’t wish for less challenge, wish for more wisdom.”

Thank you for your attention. Remember you are your own competition.

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