Daddy’s girl? Mama’s boy? Daddy or mama spoiled you, huh? They’d do anything for their baby.

Girl you didn’t have to want for anything. Just pout your lips or stomp your feet. Valentine’s Day never greeted you without a bouquet of roses, balloons, bears, and candy waiting at the school. He cared for you like fine china. Even after you left the nest, he kept your car washed and oil fresh. Repairs needed around the house, just call daddy.

Daddy has nothing on you mama’s boy because he wasn’t around so you got all of her attention. She babied you ever step of the way. You couldn’t do anything wrong in her eyes. Washed and folded your laundry until…well maybe she still does. You don’t know how to care for the lawn. Doesn’t matter that Dad wasn’t around, she never made that your responsibility. Added to the list of unknowns…changing tires, fixing a leak, replacing light bulbs, or washing cars. Instead of using your back, she choose to hire someone. And don’t you love how she fixes your favor meals just right as you like them, when you want them.

Nothing is wrong with these things…on the surface. Nothing is ever wrong until. Until that day you decide to marry that woman or man of your dreams. You two move in together. Oh how excited this will be. Everyone said you will be the perfect couple. And you are set to prove them right. You won’t let nothing come between you and your spouse.

Until…you start to notice that she doesn’t cook like mama. Not that it isn’t good but mama cooked often and fixed your plates,

beverage and carried it to you. Mama had dinner on the table at a certain time and meals were fresh often. Mama washed, folded, and ironed your clothes. “Say what…you not my mama?” Well maybe I need to call mama to take care of these things for me.

Yard isn’t cut as often as daddy did it. Car goes unnoticed. And what about that trash? Why do you have to constantly remind him to do things? And where is your Valentine’s Day gift that should’ve been sent to your job? He is trippin you think. Paying bills…who me, that’s what daddy did. Give my money to you after I get paid because your dad took care of those things. Boy bye!

You see, each of us grew up in households that operated in unique ways. But to you, you thought that’s how everyone did things. Unbeknownst to you, all dads are not like yours boo. Other boys had to cut yard growing up. Therefore this ignorance reached our new addresses and we began to grade our spouses based off of what we think a husband or wife ought to be based on our own upbringing as well as what we witnessed around us.

These expectations have selfishly lead us to start viewing our spouses with different eyes. What does love have to do with it? This person isn’t doing what I want them to do. They are not fulfilling my needs and this is not what I signed up for. I must have met the wrong person. Can’t be my soulmate. Thought I loved them but they just aren’t meeting MY expectations. Therefore, I am unhappy. I am not satisfied. Nope you don’t deserve my poonanie. So you hold out. And he does less and less because of it. Communication is off now. Fun times are limited. Bitterness begins to set in. It’s just a matter of time. Calling Alexander Shunnarah….

Thank you for your attention. Remember you are your own competition.

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