After starting this blog I asked my husband what he thought about it. His response was “I’m just waiting until you start discussing me on there.” Well here it is.

I’ve been married to James 2,892 days and I have to be honest, I haven’t liked him many of them days. Hell and I’m sure a good percentage of the remaining liked days he didn’t like me. Probably many disliked days were mutual. And that’s cool because that’s how it should be. Wonder why this 20/20/60 (my dislike/his dislike/our in-like days), 30/30/40, or 25/25/50 or whatever the percentage may be…wonder why this is ok?

Well, I don’t think God puts two people together that are the same. I think we are different on purpose. One is a neat freak, the other junkie. One is an introvert (that’s me) and one an extravert (James). Notice I didn’t label that first comparison? I’m no fool. Not about to have this blog add to that middle percentage. Lol. One likes to cook, one can’t cook (family has to eat). One plans while the other is spontaneous. Take a moment and think of the differences between you and your spouse or significant other. You two have several differences and guess what, it just works and it can work very well especially when you remember these differences as they appear. But chances are, you are like me and you forget…hence I don’t like my husband everyday.

When it comes to having a friend, I consider James to be my BFF…and it amazes me how he remembers soooo much about so many things. I mean he knows the names of the rookies on the bench, scores from games in 76, who fought his freshman year like who threw the first punch to who won to who instigated the fight, all to knowing what I wore the day we meet. Ask him if you don’t believe me. What did I have on when we met? He will spit it out! But let me ask him about something I excitedly shared with him about my day or something I want to do. I can ask him the next day about what I shared or if he is ready to go and he not even know what I’m talking about. What kind of friend is that? On those days I yelled “you don’t remember nothing” and storm off as I can’t stand him. 

Ever look at your kids while they are acting up and sometimes you know who they got that behavior from and just roll your eyes? Well I do especially with that lil boy of ours. He got some of his daddy ways man I tell ya, it’s a shame some traits/gifts just keep on giving. Those two are good at acting like you ain’t talking. I KNOW YOU HEAR ME! And I can’t get help when it comes to the girl child. He talks a good game but as soon as she bats them eyes, he turns to a puddle of water. Really! Really! She gets away with everything with him and here I go looking like the bad guy. Sigh…

So NO I don’t like his ass everyday! But after those days, I often reflect on our relationship. Think about how sweet he can be. If there is something I want, he wants to get it for me. Like leave the house at midnight to get a pregnant wife a pickle type of action. Sometimes I have to repeat myself over and over again “babe, I’m for real, I don’t need it, I’m good,” to loosen his “get it for her” spirit. Then I smile to myself. As one of the kids run by, I think how he loves them so, he is extremely overprotective, but so good with them. He takes care of them just as well as I do (not better, I’m the best, I’m mommy like it’s against the rule for him to be better, I won’t stand for that!). I smile really big then. 

The reason I said our like/dislike percentage works is because no matter how many days we don’t like one another, we keep on working through them. One day not long ago, we had a few dislike days running together. Afterwards I asked if we were “back together” (joking through text) and he asked “did someone die?” Confused I asked what he meant. His response “it said till death do us part.” Ha! Smiling now as I type. You see I may not like him everyday but there’s not one day I don’t love him. 

Not my regular goal related blog but it can be actually. You may think you have or are falling out of love with your spouse. I’m here to tell you, try relabeling how you feel. When going through, say to yourself “I don’t like her/him today.” But then take a few moments to remember why you married them, how they bring out the best in you, recall those super sweet gestures, their hugs, their playful kisses, their goofiness that makes you laugh (James is definitely the goofy one)! See what happens is, when we are having a dislike day, the enemy likes to fool us into believing the worse about our spouses. And he couples the negatives with forgetfulness! It’s crazy how we forget all the good times when we are having our moments. I want to encourage you all, keep on remembering and keep on loving one another. 

Love you babe…today…forever!

Thank you for your attention. Remember you are your own competition. 

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